BLAME THE LIQUOR

Ever been in that awkward situation where you just wanted to vaporize in an instant? When trying to act nice to a stranger becomes an impossible mountain to climb, or opening up to that lovely lady seems deeper than the deepest mining shafts at the Obuasi Gold mines? Well, I have always wanted those situations to arise, when I had built up enough gusto to face them. But unfortunately, they seem to be trickling in at a pace faster than I could possibly imagine. Some seem to think the liquor, whether hard or soft, would carry those moments aloft. But I beg to differ with that plastered plot.

Taking shots of alcohol have helped many a man to lay away shreds of fear and frequent fits of low self-esteem whenever they deem it crucial. Chemically belonging to the group of compounds known as ethyl alcohols or ethanol, these tonics have taken centre-stage in our daily lives. Though the original name denoted any fine powder Alchemists of medieval Europe applied to essences, obtained through distillation, its present usage has absolutely nothing to do with powder but has everything to do with short glasses and tall concoction bottles.

If alcohol would rid my being of self-belief bankruptcy, then I’d rather remain sober and out of sorts for the rest of my natural life. It’s completely outrageous to think that attaining drunkenness would somehow help in overcoming an overly-intimidating backdrop, which could be an office occupied by a bevy of ladies or your father finding you and your girlfriend in the most preposterous of positions in his master bedroom. I have not tried a full bottle yet, but I’m pretty sure its magical powers do not exist.

And to those impotent male Homo sapiens, who think the millions of mitochondria lurking within their scrotal sacs would multiply instantly, I dare say, you are in dreamland: sadly enough, without Alice as your companion. Many of these dreamers actually sit behind the wheels of our public transportation pretending to take control of their vehicles until Mother Nature feels cheated enough and slaps the living daylight off their faces. This actually happens on a daily basis here in Africa, with the culpable ones always left off the hook by the open arms of death.

Just gave a beautiful belle one lusty smirk, with no whiskey at work.... 

Written by : Kojo Essuman Ackah
(C) Copyright ~ 2011 All Rights Reserved

@Poetikojo<-----------Follow me on twitter

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