Monday, 1 May 2017
I'm drowning my silent sorrow with a lot of noise. Whenever i re-lapse into my depressive state, I pray in my bathroom without thought of time, or I'd start sinning with some secular music playing from my broken laptop. Don't give me the hypocrite rhetoric. Not now.
Right now, the stalemate I'm looking at isn't changing. No matter how many routes of change I employ, both gnosis and epignosis.
Don't talk me into doing what will make you happy. I could explode now and the pain would lose its hold on me. You'd be happy that the pain left, but the prelude, not so much. Maybe I'm too emotional at the moment. Maybe I'm just thinking too much. Or maybe you're giving up when the journey hasn't even begun yet.
Some didn't survive immediately after their flight begun, others have hung on despite the infidelity. Both, not our lot, but why this now? Be August...